Sunday 17 October 2010

I Babu

As we hurtle towards the two year mark I have a mix of emotions regarding Toddler B. On one hand I am tearing my hair out as she forms opinions, thoughts and 'character' - you may think a toddler cannot possibly have an opinion, well you're wrong.

When asked if she wants to do something? eat something? if she likes something? she very definitely tells us "Noooooo" with a firm head shake. If she really doesn't want to do something she expresses her opinion in the form of rolling around the floor making a sound not too unlike a dying hyena. These are the bad points, the stressful points, the inevitable points of her approaching the "terrible two" stage. Yet, on the other hand I am adoring how she is forming opinions, thoughts and 'character'. I love how we can sit at opposite ends of the sofa drinking a cup of tea each whilst 'talking' about the latest episode of Waybuloo. I grin as I watch her pull open her bedroom drawer and select her outfit for the day, which, although doesn't always match, is definitely always creative. I almost cry every time her little voice shouts "Mama, I babu" which to other people probably sounds like utter babbledygook but I know she's saying "Mama, I Love you" because she points to her eye, her heart, then to me as she says it.

It's confusing to one minute feel like crying because she's having the hugest hissy fit known to man but then the next minute (after she's been sat on the naughty step) I feel like crying because she is covering my face in 'I'm Sorry' kisses. I am regularly struggling with the conflicting thoughts of a/ wondering whether it's appropriate to keep her in the garden shed and b/ not wanting to discipline her because I don't want to be the one that makes her cry.

I know that all of these emotions I feel are going to continue for the rest of our lives which in a strange way is actually quite comforting. It doesn't matter how many little clumps of hair I pull out or how many tissues are soaked with my tears, none of it matters because 'I Babu'

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